Prep Update

Here is a list of what I have to do in order to even submit for insurance approval:

6 months of a medically supervised program - MAY NOT BE NEEDED FOR APPROVAL! I spoke with my insurance and this is not one of their requirements! So, hopefully I will be applying at the end of the month.

Sleep Study

Endoscopy

Nutritionist Appointment- scheduled

Psychiatric Assessment

Attend at least one surgical support group meeting- scheduled

Snoooooze.

I had my sleep study last night. I honestly didn't believe that I had apnea....so imagine my surprise when they called me today and diagnosed me with severe apnea.

I am really struggling with this and I don't know why.

I know that this is "technically" a good thing since it will help build my case for insurance approval, but it is still tough. I have lived as a fat girl for 22 years without major issue. It was always a great excuse to say my weight didn't matter. I didn't have all of these problems that the government was claiming were inevitable when you were overweight. Now, in my thirties, I am starting to see the impact this extra weight is having and it is hard. Please understand that I in no means am comparing apnea with diabetes or heart disease, but you still do get a bit of a reality check.

Weight is a tough issue. You have half the people pushing that you can be healthy at any weight and that you should love yourself for who you are on the inside. The other half is saying that weigh ti the root of all evil...sucking away our tax dollars through the health care system.

Prep.

Here is a list of what I have to do in order to even submit for insurance approval:

• 6 months of a medically supervised program
• Sleep Study
• Endoscopy
• Nutritionist Appointment
• Psychiatric Assessment
• Attend at least one surgical support group meeting

Here is what I have completed:

• 3 months of a medically supervised program
• Endoscopy
• Psychiatric Assessment

How it began...

I know that no one is reading this, but I wanted to get some of my thoughts down about this whole process. What process am I talking about? Gastric Bypass. Dum dum da dum daaaaaa.

I can remember the moment that I decided to look into surgery. I was reading an article and the woman was talking about how she had lost 100 pounds in 6 months. All I could think of is where I would be if I dropped 100 lbs. It would take me to 40 lbs BELOW my lightest weight ever. It would take me to within 40 lbs of my "dream weight". Could that be me? Could I do that?

I decided to go to the information session at the weight center. A few weeks before the session I started researching. A lot. It was kind of amusing because I told Tim as we were driving to the hospital that I was concerned I hadn't done enough...like I was studying for a test in college or something. Turns out I was one of the better prepared people there. I bring this up only so I can illustrate just how shocked I was by some of the questions coming out of people's mouths. It was like they thought they could just stop by the hospital, get the surgery and the weight would somehow disappear without them having to do any work at all.

Truth be told, that is partially how I viewed the surgery in the past. I felt like it was the "easy" way out. Nothing could be further from the truth. More on that to come.

This is it.

Do you think somone could survive on one to two tablespooons of food three meals a day?

They can.

...and I will.